Letter to Self

Dear Self,

 For awhile now I have wondered what life is really about. I know I am viewing myself through the haze of what the surrounding environment has molded me into. I do not see the real me as I don’t know the real me. I feel like a slave to how others have taught me to think, feel, behave and react. I am in the process of learning to unlearn that which has shaped my life up until now.

 The conventional world is foreign to me; I feel I don’t fit in. Some things just don’t sit well with me and I am at a loss as to why I feel this way. I am being told that is how it is, this is how it should be; why don’t I believe them? What if everyone else is wrong and I am right?

 I feel the pressure of having to conform. I feel helpless. Is that the real me talking or is it the construct that I have been led to believe. I’m not lost but rather out of place. I feel I am living in a time when all of what we know as life should be questioned. But what is the question? Why is it this way? How can it be this way? What can be done to change it? Can it be changed? Can any one person change the world?

 My mentor and friend told me that I already change the world by being it, by my very existence. Every moment I impart onto the fabric of life through the choices I make.

 I desire to find the real me, the self I was even before I was born, the original imprint of my creation. I desire to know how I truly affect all of those around me. What I “have been”, and what I “can be” are not important, I want to know the “I am”.

 Maybe the best question to ask myself is “Who am I?” But do I really want to know the real me? What if I don’t like what I find! Where can I hide once I know the truth?

  Is the existence of God the greatest mystery or is it the awareness of Self. It is easier for me to believe in God than myself as I feel the walls of deceit shut me off from reality. 

 There is a deep yearning within which I hope will lead me to the purpose of my quest and direct my journey to self discovery. It is now that I know the child within is ready! All I request now is . . . . . God, “Show me the truth. “


Shedding the Emotional Shackles

Isn’t life fantastic! I have been dealing with the emotional addiction of my “expectations of others’.  It is so freeing to just let people be!  My relationship with others around me has changed and the relationship with my partner has transformed bringing more enjoyment.  It is a choice and anyone can achieve the same or greater results by simply doing the work. The answers are within and are always emotional.  I hope to ignite the spark in people who are curious by repeating some of the information as I use different words to relay the same meaning. One thing I have learned over time is that not everyone communicates the same way.

Not all processing produces results.  It’s a waste of time and effort dealing with stuff that is not real. Once again I mention that my belief is that events are brought forth to give us the opportunity to release error emotions and confront our beliefs, addictions and fears by triggering an emotional response. In that moment one can choose to either express it in its true form or not. Blocks are set up to cover true causal emotions.

  Instead we respond with self-deceptive emotions. As soon an emotion comes up of denial, blame, minimization, justification, commiseration or judgment, the true emotion has been skipped over.  Most emotional responses are learned in childhood and as adults they create a persona to suppress and hide how they really feel as a defense mechanism.  This false self is what is presented to the world. This is the kind of stuff that will waste time and effort.  Progression is always reflected back through the law of attraction and is the guide to whether causal emotions are being released.

One of the first things to learn about emotional processing is to be totally honest, true to self and to own ones emotions.  Emotional addictions can be detected. It’s common to have an expectation of friends, family, partners and strangers to respond in a particular way.  We tend to want to feel good and/or important. Whenever there is a need from outside of oneself, there is an addiction of expectation.  I call it an addiction because the moment someone doesn’t get a desired result they feel hurt. Everyone has free will and no one has to love you, care for you or reciprocate to any of your needs. The reality is that not all emotions are pleasant. It is necessary to experience ALL emotions including those that are unpleasant. Pain is how the body conveys the message emotions are not being dealt with.    

 The law of attraction operates on the soul condition of the person and can also bring forth not only negative but also positive and pleasurable experiences. These too intensify as error emotions are released allowing truth to enter, bringing greater joy and bliss. Breaking the emotional shackles that constrain one is truly liberating.

In life there are times when one needs to take a leap of faith. When one does one may discover that the thing they were avoiding or afraid of the most, turns out to be very freeing and rewarding. Believing opportunities only ever come once in a lifetime, is an error belief. Life should be full of joy and does offer numerous opportunities, but if someone is not ready to take hold of what is presented, it slips away.

 For me personally the positive benefits have and still are enough incentive to continue on my journey as I am beginning to reap the rewards.  

Manifestation 101 Part 2: Seeds of Creativity

Manifestation does not only pertain to long-term or major goals but to daily ones as well. It’s more than wanting that special house or person in your life. It is about the little things that involve making decisions from day to day, moment by moment. Sure, continue to bump into the side of the table every time you walk passed it or actually change something so it doesn’t happen again. It could be as simple as walking around the table in another direction, turning or moving the table. If you can’t physically move it yourself, organize for someone to come over and move it for you. Have you considered getting rid of it or swapping it for another one? Use your creativity to find an answer.

 “Where attention goes energy flows”, how true is that. Unhappiness can be compounded and it doesn’t take much to be negative, I know that from experience!  Being positive on the other hand can take more effort, especially if we’ve had it tough in some way. It is definitely worth it though and it may take a bit of discipline on our part to get the ball rolling. I originally believed the power of positive thinking was a way of covering up the truth of how we really feel, e.g. “I don’t feel very happy, yet I must be positive or at least appear to be positive around others”. Yes this can be the case, but we can choose to be totally honest with ourselves and admit what the real situation is, why we want to change it or why we don’t want to change it – especially if we are getting hurt by it in some way.

 There are plenty of addictions being met every moment to avoid the truth about how we actually feel: Are you truly having that beer because you enjoy it or are you escaping from the life you created? Are you constantly at the pub avoiding your wife and/or family? Are you working long hours and using the excuse that you need to finish something, need the money or enjoy your job? Why are you drawing in smoke to calm your nerves? Why do your nerves need calming in the first place?

 We have all at one stage run from ourselves and the life we have created and used various excuses. We avoid, justify, minimize and deny the truth of our situation as not to feel the truth. We put on metaphoric blinkers to not see what truly is. We created this and it is up to us to change it. How is running ever going to fix the situation? And NO there is no magic pill – that’s another form of running away.

 I realise not everyone is ready to process through their emotional baggage and most don’t even desire to do so and that is fine, but in my opinion it is the ultimate course of action. So until then, one could try to accept the current situation and then follow it with the desire to improve. Through the choice to make that change we take action.

 One can continue to remain “feeling bad” or “unhappy” or one can choose to change. The magic word here is – DO! By applying creativity it ultimately changes the situation (for better or worse). By being creative we connect to something greater than ourselves through our actions. Our desire may bring forth the opportunity, but it is our actions that create the change. So if someone desires change for the better and then acts through their creativity thus resulting in a sense of “feeling better; this can be viewed a positive result. Then if the same principles are applied again, the outcome should be the same. If not there needs to be more creativity applied to achieve the desired objective.

Another secret is – BE. Some people call it “being”, “the now” or “being in the now”. It is all about being present. There’s a lot of daydreaming going on out there! Another one is robot mode and that is purely going through the motions. As we are the physical aspect of ourselves on this planet, we are only ever real right now; everything else is either the past or the future. We are living now; we are to be here now. We compromise our future by not consciously being HERE. We can’t get to there unless we here. It is from here that we can move forward to the future consciously, with or without the aid of the past. So a great place to start is the desire is to be here right now!

 The condensed version:

How do I feel in my current situation? *

Do I desire to change my current situation?

Do I choose to change my current situation?

How can I improve my current situation creatively? #

I now act creatively.

I now see/feel the results of my creativity.

# Not happy with the result – return to the creative step

* Happy with the result but desire more – return to the first step

Before I finish I would like to cover intention. Manifesting is not always positive and as we are all interconnected, what one person does will affect everyone else. Be careful what you wish for! – Sound familiar? We can either create or destroy. We are all responsible for the ripples we send out into existence, it is our choice whether our actions are to benefit or to harm.

Manifestation 101 Part 1: Be careful what you wish for!

I was talking with a friend recently about goals/dreams and I commented that I need to watch what I wish for as my manifestations are coming through faster.  This sparked some curiosity as to how I do it. I took a long deep breath – the thought of trying to explain it in writing at the time seemed rather daunting, thus here I am a week later finally putting all of the pieces together for anyone who is interested. Please be aware this is how I do it at the moment and even since last week new knowledge has come through and it has evolved yet again.

 What if we could wish for anything and it came to be? Believe it or not it is happening already and everyone is doing it all of the time! Our desires through our emotions, thoughts and actions (inaction is also a choice) are constantly creating the world around us. Whether anyone agrees that they created their current circumstances or not, THEY are the major player in their own life. So if we are the main reason why our life is as it is and we desire change – it is up to us to make that change. I am aware that in some cultures there are restrictions to certain liberties and freedom. I can only write through my own experience and circumstances.

 The steps I take are not new; there are plenty of programs out there that teach goal setting. I personally write down what I want with as much detail as I can put into it and experience it with all of my senses, imagining it in the now; I put a date on when to achieve it by and then let it go.  If you are like me when I first started, I didn’t know what I wanted so I wrote down what I didn’t want and turned it around to the positive. Not everything works for everyone and there is usually a reason for this.  It could be that you haven’t put down enough information, it isn’t written clearly enough (it may have already manifested but you don’t recognize it), you don’t believe you deserve it or just don’t desire it enough – is it really what you want from your heart or what you think you want? Are you emotionally ready for what you desire?

 Be thorough! Be honest! Be passionate!

 I put my success down to “emotional processing”. We all have baggage from childhood yes, but it’s also about being honest about how we feel in any one situation – in the present. We have all learned responses that have been created to presumably keep us safe, but it is usually a means of avoiding how we really feel – generally created through fear. In one of my previous posts I mentioned the law of attraction and how ones soul condition governs what comes to them. Emotional processing is the means of changing one soul condition. It is through doing emotional work for the past two years that I have come to this space of sharing my experiences with others.

 Now that I am consciously creating the world around me quicker than ever it’s brilliant, yet a little scary too (yes I still have fear) as I know that it’s not only good intentions that can create my reality. I’m changing habits by choosing to think and act positively, as well as being aware of my self talk and of unspoken judgmental thoughts. A note of caution – wishing for everything at once can end up bringing you more than you bargained for! I am taking baby steps and learning from my creation because I am curious as to how it all works.  Like toddlers we can choose to take baby steps, one step at a time, occasionally falling down but persisting and when we finally do walk, it will be monumental!

Back to Basics

As I am now focusing on learning to love myself, I have been going through older journals to when I first learned about emotional processing and I see new information that I somehow skipped the first time around, the bits that I wasn’t ready or willing to hear then. My notes covered the fundamental, yet key steps which I have been following ever since. As I kept reading I realised why I still follow the teachings I was introduced to over two years ago – that reason being because it all made sense and I also know the process works. Back then something inside ‘clicked’ and I knew that for me, this was the missing piece of the jigsaw puzzle

 Some days it’s not easy to be honest with myself and to own my emotions thus I am quick to judge. I don’t consciously beat myself up, but I am beginning to be aware of certain repeated patterns, generally through hind sight. My notes have been really handy as they remind me that most of my causal emotions entered me within the first 10 years of my life. I was only a child, so why do I judge myself so harshly? I need to take a step back, pause, employ a more gentle approach and consider the child within.

 Since I started on my emotional journey I have learned so much about myself and it is only the tip of the iceberg. As I remind myself that all sickness is emotional; I myself am responsible for all of the pain I experience.  Along the way I have found various tools that have aided me in my journey alongside the every day encounters with people.  I focus my intention to connect to my deep causal emotions, it is only then that these tools can be affective.

 I personally have utilized the assistance of a various techniques of energy work to help me. Through this I am reminded why energy healing is so affective: Energy flow in our spirit-body is what keeps us well. When there is a block to the flow of energy in any part of our spirit-body, our physical body is also affected if the energy is reduced for any amount of time. That then exposes the corresponding part of our body to outside risks (colds, flu) as well as internal risks (cancer).

One of my desires is to improve my quality of life and basically I have chosen this path. I now reflect on how it all works.  My emotional (soul) condition is what governs my law of attraction. What I create/manifest is reflected back at me through my Law of Attraction. So if my creation/manifestation is not as positive as I would like it to be, then I need to change my soul condition. At the same time the Law of Cause and Effect is in play.  I realise that trying to change the effect is pointless while the cause is still inside of me; it’s like a dog chasing its own tail.  So in a nutshell: I need to improve my soul condition; address the cause by experiencing all of my emotions, which ultimately changes the effect and therefore my Law of Attraction.

 As I learn to become more heart/soul oriented, I am noticing the lessening of emotional numbness/suppression which is generated by the intellectual gymnastics that is going on inside my head. I need to slow down, there’s no need to hurry and thus as I learn to be patient with myself I see that I don’t always have to get it right. All that matters is that I hang in there, as every small step forward produces results. It is incredible to feel and see the change within myself and the people around me as I progress. This process is so simple, yet not easy. It takes a lot of courage and honesty with oneself to undertake such a journey. My growing desire creates the dedication to continue my evolution from a thought/intellectual dominant being into the emotional Soul that I was created to be.