If it’s happening to me – It’s because of me!

Have you ever wondered why bad things keep happening to you? Why one minute things are going sweetly and the next contains hurt or tragedy? WE can have control over whether life beats us up or builds us up through the choices we make and through the lack of choices we make. We can go through life and blame it or others for all of the unpleasant situations that come to us or WE can take charge and change the parts of self which draw these situations to us. I totally believe that everything happens to us whether pleasant or unpleasant due to what is in the depths of our heart and soul. Through changing what is in our soul we change what events life brings us. It’s quite simple and I believe that until you personally realise this truth for yourself and act on it, life will continue as it has up until now.

The title of this post says it all: If it’s happening to me – It’s because of me! Some may balk at this and to some this may seem farfetched or laughable, but if you took the time to experiment with this as I have, you would be greatly surprised and maybe even learn a few things about yourself. This to me has been the biggest and best lesson that I have learned thus far. I share this in hope that it may help and inspire others on their path.

You see, I was one of these people who were on the “rat wheel” for most of their life, running around in circles and repeating the same things over and over again. Occasionally stopping but eventually hopping back on that wheel or a similar one. And then I learned this, “To change something, you have to CHANGE something”. This is not always something physical. Our beliefs about ourselves, life and everything in it are all driven by our heart and soul. Our mind is a tool which we can choose to help access the truth of what is in our soul.  When the two work together we can create our life in harmony with all other life. But be warned, commencing this journey to self may reveal that the truth is not all we want it to be. We can choose to ignore what we uncover or we can acknowledge it, accept that “this is who I am right now” and then make a decision to release the parts which bring pain and suffering. How do you know the difference? If the result is joy – keep it, if the result is pain – change it. One thing to remember though is that the results of some actions can take many years to manifest, so I recommend the use common sense in your discernment.

 One of the first things I changed was my beliefs about what I considered loving and this may be something you will also need to consider. The soul is like a storage box. It is filled with all sorts of stuff, generally stuff we don’t need, stuff that gets old, mouldy and creates pain. For new stuff to come in, old stuff has to be taken out, then there will be room for new things – new beliefs, feelings and understanding. Do some spring cleaning on your belief system, not just your house and surroundings!

In the past like many others, I have chosen to compromise and find an acceptable means of indirectly harming myself, rather than opting to discover my own personal power and honouring it. This is where most low self-esteem issues and lack of self-worth originates from. Have you ever considered that the reason why you feel unworthy or have low self-esteem is due to not honouring and loving yourself? How well do you know yourself – really know yourself? What are your beliefs and your values and do they help you or hinder you from growth? Do you ever get bored, apathetic or just don’t know what you want from life? All of these are from not knowing and dishonouring self. Are you happy with the result that years of moulding by parents, friends and society have created – the “you” that you know now? Have you ever wondered why you are the way you are? Or do you just accept that life will continue bringing you pain and hardship because that’s how it has been for generation after generation?

Let’s look at what a lack of self-worth can create. It creates anger, fear, bitterness, greed and a desire for power. If we knew the truth about ourselves and then through desire found our own personal worth and love which brings its own power, we wouldn’t have wars or have a desire to harm others. Self-love and personal power bring inner peace and opens us up to the gift of abundance in all avenues of life. We are then also in a space of acceptance of all people regardless of what part of the journey they are on. Tolerance brings compassion and forgiveness.

Generally speaking, I see daily how society manipulates the population to believe that doing for ourselves is selfish, If you look back at what you were taught from a young age, were you told that you HAD to share whether you wanted to or not? Regardless of the generosity of sharing, you were generally not given the choice and then subsequently punished for not following those instructions.  So now instead when you don’t share you feel guilty, ashamed or are compulsive in some way. But then after several generations many may be selfish, all due to emotions of lack within in some shape or form. ANY feeling of lack is about a lack of self-awareness, self-acceptance and self-love, all of which come from not knowing self. But do most of us question the choices and actions that we make? Is there anyone out there besides me that desires to know the truth of who they REALLY are and why they are that way and most of all how to change?

It is quite ironic that the same society that taught us not to be selfish and in turn helped create our lack of self-worth, then in the same breath, uses these false beliefs we have in ourselves to sell us products and merchandise that helps cement these errors into our psyche. Society feeds on our beliefs and emotions of unworthiness through want and greed, and then makes a fortune from it. It is profitable to have a population that feels bad about themselves, that doesn’t want them to find out the truth or to start being responsible for themselves. This same population will believe anything that is told to them rather than find the truth for themselves. Someone is getting rich off of your ignorance – some call it consumerism. Our emotional state is so easy to manipulate and it’s not only psychologist that have this knowledge. So why not choose to change your emotional state?

After a rather large sigh I can add that regardless of what I say, some people will choose ignorance, maybe because it’s easy or because it’s all they have ever known. They may merely not be aware that there are other options or that they themselves allow this manipulation to go on. Whether you choose to bury your head in the sand or just say some angry words, you don’t actually change where it counts the most and that starts with YOU. Change yourself and the world changes around you. There are many quotes out there with this wisdom, it’s not new and you don’t have to listen to me.

At the end of the day it is all up to you, because it is always only ever about you. Your life happens because of everything that comes from your soul and your soul is emotional. If you are changing your mind and nothing changes significantly, then try changing your heart and feel the difference. It is always your choice.

Above I have mentioned honouring self and I really believe this is crucial part of self-love but there is an honour that is greater still. To conclude I wish to add one final note and all I ask is that you simply be open to the possibility. As with the concept of experimenting with honouring self, consider honouring God as someone separate to self and see what that brings you. Give it a try, what have you got to lose?

I believe that as we learn to love and honour ourselves, all honour and glory should be to God. For as we did not create ourselves, our life journey is always to seek the truth of whom we are so that we may one day hopefully desire to know our Creator. At this moment we are but an image of the Divine and to become the substance we need to develop a desire for it. It isn’t something that we are born with or that will naturally come to us. There needs to be a conscious desire for it.

And once you start this part of your journey you will learn something new that goes against what I wrote above about having control. Involve God in your journey and you will discover that to get closer to God you will have to learn how to relinquish that control . . . . Confused?  Now that is a topic for a future post.

Even though I may not put this on the bottom of all of my posts, all comments are welcome and if you do, please remember this is my journey and you don’t have to agree with me or walk with me.